Eve
You heard back from my number one choice re jobs they want to see me which is fucking brilliant. I hope things go well and I can go and work there. We shall see.
The circus what a fucking crock the sooner I am the hell outta dodge the better.
Need to get headphones for iPod as ears hurt when listening to music.
Have just added lots of Giles Peterson, Paulo Nutini Johnny Cash???? And another song so new music is always good.
guess who's, back beeton's back, tell a friend beetons back
come on you punk mother fuckers
Peace
P.S. I think I fancy the Brazilian again I can't help it. The birthday cake thing is a bitter disappointment I just need to make a move. 2 days to Belgium...... Kim is going dam straight.
The dam may not be a good idea but who knows. I may just have to lay off the acid ha ha ha
All along the watch tower
If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it does it make a sound?
Where to start I am redoing my CV thank fuck. I have found a third company I like the look off. They do not have a New York office though. I will resend CV to the two I like in time I hope they have forgotten about me when I send them again. I will get Sinton and his missus to run there critical eye over them.
I may have some consulting work which could be good and start Beetsearch. We shall see the guy enjoys his devils dandruff my mate is involved he is clean and at the time of writing I trust him. Tally's dad is going to advice me on how to invoice for my time.
The circus is becoming semi tolerable. Still a fucking circus though. I am tired and off to bed soon I am tired and bored.
Laterz
Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks
Dr Dre mother fucker
Gutted I have sent out a couple of CV's and just taken a look at them tonight and to be fair the CV is fucking shit and can be drastically improved. I thought I would hear something straight away but I have heard fuck all.
I am gutted I sent my CV to the two agencies that I have had my eye on for quite a while now. The CV is just shit I can't believe I didn't see it before. I just didn't see it. Two weeks later well a week having already sent the CV off I now see how bad it is. I feel almost embarrassed.
FM is defo no appening me thinks which is fair enough but I need to get the hell outta dodge but need cash money so need to change job.
I heard an old mate from Uni has got engaged today. That should be a good thing and I should be happy for him but it just makes me feel down and reinforces my singledom. I don't know man this is just all doing my Swede in trying to get a new job maybe move into town .
Apparently there are bundles of jobs in my sector but I have to be careful I can earn a good wage but don't want to go from the frying pan to the fire.
I phoned one of the agencies I am keen on not expecting anyone to answer on a Sunday night quite late and someone actually picked up the phone, apparently they were working late on finance but the girl I spoke to reassured me they had been out on Thursday night. It is not a good sign when you phone a company late on Sunday night and people are in working. Maybe it is a good thing I bucked my initial CV. The other agency I have heard nothing from and I am really keen on them. I may re do my CV then send it directly I have a couple of names I know of who I could send it too.
Recruitment Consultants may be the way but I would rather put the work in myself re redoing my CV as this will mean more money in my pocket at the end of the day. I just do not sell myself there is a distinct lack of confidence in the way I describe my current role. I use the job spec my boss put together and through my views on my boss I should know not to do that. I hope it is not too late or it has literally been lost in a black hole of an email address. That would be ideal. I may change my time length at YSM!!!
This sort of thing has to be done you only get one life then you are dead so who gives a shit. I can't believe how bad my CV is overall it is not that bad but it could be so much better it is just annoying. I am working on it and have taken various job specs of similar roles and pasted them onto my CV I will make this relevant to me then send out to Greenlight again. I think I should be a little more honest and open in my CV and I can really change the computing skills section on my CV.
I have the job I like now but have put together my CV in the mindset of a junior employee. I will be 30 in June. I should have more confidence in me be myself in my CV and covering letter and if I have given 100% and the cunts don't like me then fuck em but sending that sorry excuse for a CV out is just wrong.
I hate job hunting. I just canny even get a click at the moment I am just not on fire, footy is going down the pan as is love life and job it is all pretty fucking shit really. I need to sort myself out but will do so.
I really have to re do the CV it is almost an embarrassment
Life
Did you know that if is the middle word in life??
OK feeling good I think spoke to schwester earlier i hope you are not upset with my comments.
MOTD has started
I wonder what sort of girl I will end up with, thinking about it I am a bit of a oddball. I am into random shit but also shit that many others are into. My toast is done, I eat well you know.
Adrian Chiles is alright he is like Rob McCaffrey but without being a cunt. I fucking hate McCaffrey he is a condesending cunt. If you ever check out the best press conference ever given by a Monsieur Cantona after his ban about seagulls following trailers (fucking genius) you will see that cunt McCaffrey holding a mike early in his media career working for some random radio station with the worst squeal beale pat cash you will ever see.
Still working on the job/work front, things are happening but not quite as I expected. I would like to move back to London St is too dry and also I don't know many people here but in the next sentence I will probably say I want to stay in st but have to keep it real mother fucker.
I can't think of what to say I thought I had plenty but not much is going on. Hannah has gone I didn't think i wopuld give a shit as she was merely a fuck buddy but actually a little sad she has gone. I will get over her
there is something about miriam, she is a cock.. Apparently it was her birthday at the end of last week, there were mini cakes flying around in TV and people she works with but the had pictures of herself on them... what the fuck???? she was also drunk after work on Friday and seems like a complete dick. My mate Potts reckons she might have been being ironic, I get the impression she does not have the intelligence to do something like that and she is just a dick.
Although I never really had a conversation with her so could be being harsh but I doubt it I have the force.
Lee Dixon is talking triangles and in fairness it is quite interesting Lehman ze German took one in the face today German Bar steward. Good keeper though the Solksjaer save was world class right at the end as well.
FM not sure what is going on in all fairness we shall see lets put it this way serious consideration of London town is being had.
Gerrard on the left what a fucking waste no wonder we lost Rafa needs to sort it out.
Went to the Buzzard last night for China, he has that military thing about him, you can see it in his eyes, my dad has it most people I have met who are in the forces have it. Tiger woods at Chelsea... only in America.
Last night was good but "renoirs" killed me especially after Friday night it was literally an experienc on acid gone wrong. scarey truely scarey that the place exists with those people also.
I am now off to Belgium for this weekend away, the way I see it is if I am ever going to sleep with one of the girls from work before I leave a drunken works weekend away is literally going to be when it happens. I will be stone cold sober so can take advantage. If I have the urge to frink I can go to bed after ten and be done.
I hope China is safe in Afghan he should be he is going more in a supporting role. My concern comes about if he is called into real action i fucking hope not he wants to keep his head down if that is the case but knowing him he will be over the top as one of the first.
Drogba's goal was a good goal. we are never winning this championship why could Zenden not play wide left, we needed Zenden Gerrard Alonso Pennant you could maybe drop Zenden for Speedy as Zenden's legs may have gone that would have given us width to attack a very narrow Chelski.
What do I know but thats what I would have done. Kuyt looks good Bellamy also we now have four strikers who i think are capable at the highest level.
Girls at the time of writing I officially fancy no one other than FM who has a cock for a boyfriend and I think I know what I will do there ie when I feel the time is right confess all then take things from there. sooner rather than later please.
I need new chicks I will send an email to Bell and Mel re there mates. They also live in London so could reduce my travel time. Very optimistic so do not count chickens.. Ionly want fm though the others are literally just fillers.
I have the circus tomorrow which will be interesting we shall see am I bovvered
What else to say I said a lot to schwester earleir 2 hours worht which was great. Going to read past posts then comment accordingly I am out for now.
whats the difference between you and me
OK here I fucking go again. I have been away recently dying to blog but have been offline. I need to tell FM the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me god, jebus, buddah & allah. After conversing tonight I do not think i will get the desired reaction but have to tell all as I will regret it if I don't and need closure and to move on literally. I am consumed and it is doing my swede in. Nothing but existence I just want what others have and if it is not meant to be here then I will go find else where. No guts no glory.
I have to be honest I should be OK the alcohol is long gone and I have been clean for just over a week now.
I need to blog i am consumed and have actually missed it while I was offline. I went up north to see my mate Sinton and his family which was wicked. I am begining to feel like part of the family i reckon I could ma live up north for a year it would have to be manchester though. I don't think I would because London and new York call. I would be up in manc wishing i could be in london or new york. A very stoned weekend I think we are getting old because I know for sure I can't handle it anymore the way I used too. till the day I die though mother fucker.
Work is still crap but I have sent my CV to the two companies i like although they have not come back to me which is a bit of a bitch. It has only been 3 full working days though. If I haven't heard anything by Monday i will phone them. Some of the shit that goes on now at work is bordering on farcical. I so don't care it is almost scary. today was just fucking hilarious. I have better things to do with my time. I just want to get on with my job without all the fucking bullshit.
I am starting to feel a bit sorry for my boss because it is falling apart at the seams It goes back to what I said on a previous post ie mismanagement there is just not the foresight and the vision and this constantly is reinforced. I am either crazy and completely wrong or will earn a considerable increase in money within the next few months. I just have to ensure I am the hell outta there first, what the fuck.
My boss was even drinking on Monday at 6pm in the office at the desk which is never really a good sign, she also looks quite frazzled I feel sorry for her but also do not care and will look after myself. I am the one that has to live my cunting life I have just had two weeks off and couldn't afford to leave the country I also had no one to go away with. that mother fucking shit has to change. I am not sure what is going on but chicks just cannot keep there eyes off me at the moment. I am shagging Hannah again but she is off to NZ on Friday to live so I will be one fuck buddy down. I need to rectify that but ever the optimist one door closes another door opens.
I think I might get it on with Corner soon But she is so crazy I just can't tell. SHE WAS WEARING HEELS TODAY ASWELL WHICH IS ALWAS A WINNER WITH ME. We have moved seats which was a nice surprise returning from holida I now sit as clsoe as you possible could to the Loreal girls in particular miriam but am still a million miles awa because I don't think I HAVE EVEN HAD A CONVERSATION. SHE DOESN'T LOOK VERy APPROACHABLE.
I don't know what to write I thought I would have loads as I want to empty m brain but do not seem to have much to sa so will tr and sum up as it is getting late and I need to get up for the circus act I go through each day which is work. My boss has just completel lost us which must be quite a bad feeling to have as a "leader" losing your troops. I just think if you are not so wrapped up in having quotes published in trade press and living off that poxy title you will be OK as long as ou know what is going on at ground level. Anyway fuck em I will look after mself and they can suck my fucking dick.
I need to hear from the agencies I have applied for waiting is killing me but no news is good news as they say. I think I will get blown out by FM if I make my move now in the future there may be an opportunity but even then who knows. Either way if shit doesn't happen then I will carry on with the master plan London then New York then the mother fucking world. With non drinking v and the facing up to demons sex will be great and I should be able to snare a chick. The weed being out is a good thing as confident presenters generally don't look like stoners. I can't believe how much politics and crap goes on within work not just with me but others as well and still the divide between traditional and new media. what a bunch of cunts. The sooner I am settled into a search specialist the better. Google is an option but I want an overall understanding of the market place as I reckon I can move towards consulting and contract work. This ma take me towards working for myself grandad Sinton was emphasising this point and to be fair it is a very good one work for yourself or work for some cunt you in reality doesn't give a shit about you.
Affiliate programs will also make ou a mint but it is just finding the time. Imight knock foot on the head on a Saturday to concentrate on building a site for an affilitae scheme.
bitches I am consumed by fm she is fucking everywhere literally. I will confess all and probably have todeal with the consequences. London will be good as there is lots going on and more importantly lots of single girls being single in St feels like you have two heads as this is a couply young family city I would be happy being here if I was in that situation but would like to have seen every corner of the world before I get to that phase and would probably find somewhere on this planaet that is more me and does not do my cunt in. So far I don't think I have been anywhere like that.
What the fuck am I talking about all the girls at work are still looking good. Belgium what a fucking crock but there is talk of popping over the border to Amsterdam. I think a lot of the girls are going but we shall see. I wonder if corner is going I would probably have stayed in anway and fifty quid is nothing really.
08:12 train girls is back with a great pair of heels looking fit. it has been months since I have seen her. new 08:26 girls is not really that attractive but there is something about her I am sure she is into me even having stalled m car in front of her in the city centre.
I am going to bed because this isn't really working for me although could be as I continue to write aimlessly. Work is crap but now becoming funny which is a bit weird. girls I need to tell fm but at this moment do not think I will get the desired response may need to bide my time but can't do that for too long when I have got a new job sorted tell all and see what happens or literall see what happens and take things from there in the knowledge that you have to be honest and open. work same as really which one s will I fuck?? train girls but I am never really going to say anthing although might do. Tally's friends are staing on Saturday night, two girls staying over in the same bed in my flat. I have got to get involved in some way one of them is single will I be able to shag the single one??? I might have to take her out or something I don't know if I can be bothered with that but I will buzz around on saturday.
Work crap now funny need to hear back from companies applied for. shagging Hannah but she is off to NZ on Friday glad I am because it is better than not getting an at all.
I am outta here
bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay mother fucker
